In our ongoing quest to purge our home of the 1980s, we replaced the final two sink faucets and all the bathroom countertops. I know just enough about plumbing to be dangerous. Yes, I can swap out a faucet to save some money, but I can also tear a stuck PVC pipe in half with a pipe wrench and force a plumber visit anyway. After the countertop guys did their part, I spent much of this weekend installing our new sinks and reconnect all the faucets and drain assemblies. There are about 250,000 things that would have been more fun, but I finally got it done, and we are quite pleased.

With that in mind, here are some plumbing haiku.

Woe! Woe! Woe is me!
Every nut is tightened down
Why do you still drip?

Man beneath the sink?
He must be a plumber and
A contortionist.

Thirty years of gunk
Black and oozy in the pipes
I need some fresh air

What does that pipe do?
Hmm. Oh well, just add some torque…
Dang! Let’s call a pro

Doing it yourself
Doesn’t save much cash when they
Need to fix your mess

Have you experienced any plumbing woes, either through your own home “improvement” or other problems? Post your plumbing haiku in the comments.