Poop

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I don’t like poop.

It’s gross. It’s terribly inconvenient. It’s unavoidable. It’s never-ending. It’s unpleasant. It’s embarrassing. It wastes time and water. And don’t get me started on the furry critters who live in our home. They poop, too, and not always where they’re supposed to. For many years I tried not to think about it. A like-minded female friend of mine denies that ladies ever do it. I generally did my best to avoid it.

And then I had children.

Now poop is everywhere. Well, not literally everywhere. Yet. But it’s a very strange thing to be so concerned with the pooping habits of other human beings. When the boys were newborns, we tracked how often they pooped. And the color of the poop. Later Brenden helped us with a diaper study that required us to save his used diapers in individually sealed bags and then deliver them in a giant nasty bag to an office in Dallas, along with recording whether they leaked poop or not. Sometimes their normal diapers leak, too. One time Brenden pooped while I was changing his diaper, possibly the lowlight of my entire life.

Now we’re starting to potty-train Brenden. It’s mind-bogglingly humbling to sit another human being on a toilet and encourage him to poop. I cringe when I think about the future, when he is successful, and I must praise him for pooping. Are you kidding me??

Why did God make us have to poop? Couldn’t there be another way? Think about it. Remember that Mr. Fusion thing from Back to the Future II, the amazing device that could convert everyday trash into enough fuel to power a time machine? Why can’t we work like that? Why can’t we be perfectly efficient furnaces that convert every last molecule of food and drink into usable energy? No mess. No fuss. No sewage-related diseases. No shuffle of shame when you forget to check for TP before ascending the throne. No courtesy flushes, blowouts, liferafts, carefully timed fake coughs, or Poo-pourri.

What a wonderful world this could be.

But until God sees the wisdom of my plan, I guess we’re stuck. I will continue to perform my fatherly duties of keeping my sons as poop-free as possible, all the while praying for a potty-training miracle. Sweet holy moly.

2011 Bid Time

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It’s June, so the time has come for our yearly bid for the following year’s work schedule. As many of you already know, my job has a set rotation of six days on, three off, six on, three off, six on, six off. In other words, each month has three blocks of six work days, two three-day breaks, and one six-day break.

This system has its pros and cons. The big pro is the six-day break we get every month, which I can use for travel, relaxing and working at home, or picking up overtime. The big con is that my days off constantly change and don’t necessarily come on the holidays that most workers get. Here’s my November 2010 schedule as an example.

When we bid for our schedules, we’re giving our preference for the start time and the specific “line” of work. For example, line 123 might have its first February shift on the 3rd and include Thanksgiving and Christmas during its days off. Lines that have Christmas off are generally the most desirable. Line 124 might start its 30-day rotation on Feb 6, but it has work shifts on Thanksgiving and Christmas. If the line you get makes you work on a day you’d rather have off, such as Christmas, you can try to bid a vacation day. However, unless you’re in the top half of the seniority list, you probably won’t be able to get it with a vacation day.

I’m currently number 104 of 146. I think I started at 114, so I’ve moved up a bit through promotions, retirement, and other departures. The 11:00pm start time still seems to work the best for me and my family, so that’s what I plan to bid. I doubt I’ll have any problem getting it. It looks like there’s a small chance I’ll get Christmas off, depending on what the more senior 11pm guys bid.

Liberty 10k

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The first organized race I ever ran was the Cowtown 10k in February 2002. I trained in the awesome park by my new apartment in Euless. My new girlfriend, Jenny, came to cheer me on. I had no idea how much traffic the event would draw, so we got stuck in traffic and arrived late for the race. Then I got confused regarding the starting point and accidentally started on the separate 5k. Eventually I found the 10k course, jogged past all the walkers (since the runners had already turned around for the return leg), foolishly pushed through some nasty knee pain, and reached the finish line to find Jenny waiting for me. I’m pretty sure I covered at least 10k, but I don’t really know how much I actually ran since I didn’t follow a real course.

Eight years later, my running is going well, and I’m excitedly planning my next 10k. It’s a less popular distance, but I managed to find one: the Liberty 5k / 10k / 1 Mile Fun Run in The Colony on July 3. This time I’ll still be with that Jenny girl from the first race, but she’ll be staying home with our children, and I hope to start on the correct course. =)

Welcome to the Gun Show

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Jenny is once again a gym member. She wants to get in better shape, and we decided that joining a gym would be worth it for her. She went gym shopping on Tuesday looking for a comfortable gym that offered good childcare, good class selection, and a reasonable prices. Here’s what she learned from the three gyms she visited in the Euless/Colleyville area:

24 Hour Fitness

Pros: Cheapest of the three by far, childcare included with a fun-looking kids’ area, great staff.
Cons: Equipment needed updating, comparatively small, class selection is limited so classes are generally very full, no kids in the pool, very much a traditional gym with lots of muscle-bound people and aggressive personal trainers
Overall: OK if no other options, but not really what Jenny was looking for

LA Fitness

Bonus Fact: We belonged to LA Fitness for about a year when we lived in Fort Worth and really liked it.

Pros: Very nice facility, 5 minutes from our house, good class selection, nice childcare workers, few kids
Cons: No kids in the pool, childcare very expensive, kids’ area pretty small
Overall: Better for us than 24 Hour, but hard to swallow the expensive childcare

Life Time Fitness

Pros: Facility is gorgeous and huge, great class selection, indoor AND outdoor pools with waterslides, kids are allowed in pools, great childcare at little extra cost, very family-oriented, free swim lessons for kids, some friends work out there
Cons: Most expensive of the three, much more than we’d originally planned on paying
Overall: She went with Life Time. It had so much to offer that Jenny thinks she will be motivated to go several times a week, including right after dropping Brenden off at preschool twice a week this fall. The boys will be able to swim year-round and to learn how for free. Life Time is more of a sports resort than a gym. Since it’s so kid-friendly, we hope that all three of them will have a good time up there, mostly in the morning while I’m asleep.

Baylor is Saved!

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Yuk yuk yuk.

The past couple of weeks have been a roller coaster for college athletics. In case you missed the party, rumors and speculation erupted regarding a possible realignment of several college conferences with the Big 12 right in the middle of the action. Nebraska left for the Big 10. Colorado left for the Pac-10. Most signs pointed toward seeing Texas, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Oklahoma, and Oklahoma State join the Pac-10 to form a super-conference, leaving Baylor and the rest of the Big 12 North out in the cold. Another possibility had A&M joining the SEC instead, breaking up the 100-year-old rivalry with UT. As a Baylor alum and fan (yes, despite our struggles in the one sport that Texans care about most), this prospect disappointed me. Baylor would most likely be forced to join a lower-profile conference, possibly the Mountain West, which would reduce Baylor’s TV revenue, recruitment success, and player convenience due to unfavorable time zone changes and long distances to travel. Even worse from a fan’s perspective, we would lose the rivalries we have developed with Texas, A&M, and Tech.

I don’t know whether the Bears just prayed harder or the whole realignment scenario was simply a ploy to get more money, but apparently the meltdown of the Big 12 has been canceled, or at least postponed. Texas, the power player in the conference, chose not to join the Pac-10, and the other remaining Big 12 schools followed suit. Somehow the Big 12 is going to receive a huge boost in TV revenue that the remaining 10 schools will share. Baylor’s TV revenue will roughly double, we stay in a high-profile conference, and we get to keep our rivalries and maintain an easier travel schedule for the players. I am very happy, as are most of the Baylor fans.

College Football News posted a nice article that analyzes the situation in more depth.

Jonathan Is Cute

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Here are a couple of new pics from June. He loves to roll around and is getting good at holding his head and shoulders off the ground with his arms, similar to an up-dog position in yoga, I got him to sit up on his own for maybe a minute before he fell over. I figure he’ll be crawling before we know it.