{"id":2519,"date":"2010-01-13T04:00:09","date_gmt":"2010-01-13T10:00:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/?p=2519"},"modified":"2010-01-13T05:37:21","modified_gmt":"2010-01-13T11:37:21","slug":"moly-moly-moly","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/?p=2519","title":{"rendered":"Moly, Moly, Moly"},"content":{"rendered":"

I have moles<\/a>. Lots of moles. So many moles that I look like a reverse constellation – white skin with dark spots. Some people call them beauty marks. Cindy Crawford sports the most famous mole in the world, except hers is called a “beauty mark” so she can remain a supermodel. If moles make one beautiful, I should be on the cover of GQ. (I’m still waiting for my call) My dermatologist <\/a>jokes that I can keep my kids entertained for hours by letting them play connect-the-dots on my back. <\/p>\n

He also says I make him nervous. <\/p>\n

On top of my family history of skin cancer, the number and characteristics of my moles put me at higher risk for skin cancer, including malignant melanoma. I try to limit my sun exposure, which should help a bit, but the risk is already programmed into my skin regardless of sun exposure. Over time, some of my moles change in size, shape, and\/or color, making them potentially precancerous. <\/p>\n

To fight back, I visit the dermatologist twice a year, and each time he removes the two or three most suspicious moles. It’s a simple, quick procedure taking maybe 60 seconds each – anesthetic injection, removal by blade, electric cauterization. So far the lab hasn’t reported that any were actual skin cancer, but with some it was just a matter of time. After 15 years or so, I’ve had probably 40 or 50 removed. Mom nags me when necessary to schedule my next appointment.<\/p>\n

The good news is that my moles have inspired me to compose a poem, my first in a very long time. I have entitled it, as you might have guessed, “Moly, Moly, Moly”.<\/p>\n

Moly, Moly, Moly
\nDang, my skin is moly
\nLike a white dalmatian, I
\nHave spots for all to see<\/p>\n

Moly, Moly, Moly
\nMelanoma scares me
\nSo I go back each
\nSix months for surgery<\/p>\n

Moly, Moly, Moly
\nWhich ones most displease thee?
\nThrough the gift of Lidocaine
\nThy cutting does not sting<\/p>\n

Moly, Moly, Moly
\nStill millions left upon me
\nTry to play connect-the-dots
\nAnd angry I will be.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Sorry for ruining a great hymn, but it had to be done. Someday you’ll be able to sing it normally again, I promise. =)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I have moles. Lots of moles. So many moles that I look like a reverse constellation – white skin with dark spots. Some people call them beauty marks. Cindy Crawford sports the most famous mole in the world, except hers … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[23,39],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2519"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2519"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2519\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2519"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2519"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.andybox.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2519"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}